Updated: Aug 31, 2018
I have been blogging, vlogging and fair to say chatting ultimate rubbish for around five years now. And on occasions I can’t help but feel like as if I’m stuck. 'GH0STBLONDIE' is a platform I grew as an escape. I never enjoyed school, and just felt as if I never fitted in, three's a crowd and throughout every social situation and on going I've experienced it. I've always felt pushed out, and confidence has always held me back. Confidence has held me back in all aspects of life. And blogging was a place where I was able to express myself, escape and be me.
Something many people who read my blog, watch my channel and follow my instagram don't know about me is, my name is Honor. Why not use my name? I could use the name gh0stblondie, and no one I knew would ever have to know. It was a dream, I could speak and write about me, makeup and everything I love as I please. As the years go on, and I have felt more and more proud, gaining opportunities I couldn't imagine! I kept my blog secret for five years and people I know have found it, and reacted in ways i expected they would! You'll be knocked for everything great that comes your way by jealous people, but hey thats life. Theres been times where I have felt trapped and quitting 'gh0stblondie' would be the easy way out, right?
Why quit something you love, it's not just a hobby, it's a part of me. I love waking up and talking to my blogger friends on instagram, checking my youtube comments, brightening that one persons day. And checking my emails securing a job with a beauty brand which twelve year old Honor wouldn't dream of? It's all down to this.
Confidence can come in many different shapes and forms. I've always lacked it in the way which I would absolutely sh*t my self back in school if I had to speak in front of the class, it was literally my worst nightmare. I wouldn't think about anything else, days on end until it was over. Confidence has a definition - 'the feeling or belief that one can have faith in or rely on someone or something'. Having faith in all and everything around you keeps you motivated to succeed. Take Youtube for e.g.sample, three years and I've just reached five-hundred subscribers. I was ecstatic! It felt like such an achievement, I love making videos, and I love editing them so it's not about numbers, it's about those loyal subscribers that watch you. Leave a comment which makes the whole video worth while, thats more rewarding than anything, that is what gives you confidence, and it couldn't make me happier.
Brands provided you with confidence and accept you for who you are. I've worked with brands who have rewarded me in ways I cant imagine. Complimented my work, invited me to events and had faith in me. LookFantastic as a brand provided me with the Opportunity of a life time, and I met some amazing, inspiring women. Tabitha ‘TakeHeart’ is a blogger/youtuber who’s has really motivated me with her attitude to all things worth working for. Not only are her outfit posts Bomb! Tabitha’s attitude to her blog, career and life is so inspiring and has taught me to never give up!
I’m not at all comfortable with my weight. And just like everyone I find my self constantly comparing my self to others. It’s okay not to feel okay, but I’m happy in my self and that’s what matters. The LookFantastic #iamfantastic campaign stands for some amazing causes. And Bethan from ‘BethyThunder’ has spoke in ways I have found helped me out more in the past two weeks than people have in my lifetime. “Skinny doesn’t = Happy” you are beautiful!
LookFantastic provides me with a chance to meet the inspirational women and for that I am grateful, but for the fact they have also grown my confidence in ways I will never be able to thank them! Filming in front of a crew (trust me something I never thought I would be able to do!) it’s all down to the LF team! I honestly can’t thank them enough!
We are all beautiful! We are all confident! And it’s down to us to embrace our own confidence! I am Honor, and THIS IS ME !